menopausebarbees
... the tales of two sisters

Dana lives in Seattle, and Tracie lives in Germany. We are businesswomen, writers and humorists. We write about life, dating, and today's modern women.

Thank You, Angelina.

Many of you heard the breaking news yesterday of Angelina Jolie’s decision to have a double mastectomy after discovering she has the BRCA1 Breast Cancer Indicator .

As we are celebrating Mom’s this month, I found her decision to make this brave choice for her children a great gift. I am borrowing the blog from a featured member on Blogher to shed more insight on this courageous choice.

Thank you, Angelina.

Because the first thing I thought after hearing the news story about her elective double-mastectomy, was, “If she can do it, I can do it.”


April 11, 2013 – London, England, United Kingdom – Actress and UN Special Envoy ANGELINA JOLIE arrives G8 Foreign Ministers meeting a Lancaster House, where they will discuss a number of issues including the Syrian civil war. (Credit Image: © Johnathan Adam/National News/ZUMAPRESS.com)

When I found out, back in November of 2011, that I have the BRCA-1 mutation, thedecision to opt for a preventative double mastectomy, followed by an oopharectomy, was pretty much a “no-brainer.” I had lost my mother to breast cancer earlier that year,and wanted to be pro-active in making sure I wouldn’t have to face what my mom had toface: a radical mastectomy, chemotherapy, brain surgery, medication upon medication, and eventually a very heart-breaking, very painful physical decline that preceded her death. I also wanted to do what I could to make sure I would be able to enjoy many years with my children, my husband, my extended family and my friends, without my life turning into a constant battle with a life-threatening disease.

A year and a half has passed since I received the results of my genetic testing. In that span of time, I got pregnant with my second child, had a second c-section, and have breast-fed my son for five months, all which have delayed any steps I can take toward having the surgeries. I have also had time to REALLY come to terms with the decision I am facing, the impact it will have on my body, my brain, and my heart, and have had lots of time to doubt my decision. Do I really want to put my body through yet another surgery? Do I really want to see MORE scars than I already do when I look in the mirror? Am I ok with completely losing feeling in my breasts? Am I okay with becoming post-menopausal in my early 40s? Or should perhaps just be super-vigilant about self-monitoring, without opting for such a radical surgery?

It’s not an easy decision. But hearing about Angelina Jolie’s choice to get the preventative surgeries has been incredibly comforting. I mean, it’s Angelina Jolie! Never in a million years would I have thought that she and I would have much in common. But here we are, both 37 years old, both with mothers that have recently passed away from cancer, both having the BRCA-1 mutation, both having to decide what to do with the knowledge about our genetic makeup.

And, I mean, it’s Angelina Jolie! Lara Croft, Hollywood goddess, mother of eight billion children, Special Envoy of UN, wife of Brad Pitt! Ever move she makes is watched, documented, praised or criticized. She is probably one of the only women in the world who would make international headlines for making this kind of decision public.

It’s not that Angelina’s decision makes my doubts go away. And it’s not that her opting for a double-mastectomy makes my choices any easier.
This is still MY body, and MY decision to make.

But seriously, it is encouraging to know that if I DO choose to get the surgeries (which I in all likelihood will), I will be sharing my journey with a very beautiful, very brave, very public figure who chose to be proactive in making decisions about her health, her future, and her identity. Her statement, “I feel empowered that I made a strong choice that in no way diminishes my femininity,” in turn empowers me to make my decisions without feeling like I will be losing my sense of self.

So thank you, Angelina.

Dvora Koelling
Parenting with imagination. Or at least trying.